graendil

And Yet…

graendil — Thu, 23 Sep 2010 18:18:17 +0000

so nothing new as this far. i’m eating oatmeal before i go back to work. i haven’t been laid in almost four weeks. i was cool with one a week, but now even that’s been taken away. oh well, doesn’t matter much to be at this point.
i’m out.

Filed under: Dreamings

And So…

graendil — Sun, 12 Sep 2010 16:30:34 +0000

This blog will no longer have reviews on it. I’m getting out of the whole reviewing business. It holds little spark for me. I don’t know what this blog will be filled with yet, but I’ll figure something out.
Why are you getting out of ‘the whole reviewing business’?
Simple. Sex doesn’t fascinate me anymore. I used to think about it a lot, but I feel that it was more due to the fact that sex was still new and unknown to me.
Maybe you should spice it up a bit, ya know, make it not so vanilla.
While that could be a possibility, I don’t see it happening. It’s not the sex I’m getting now that doesn’t interest me, it’s sex in general. My husband and I have sex once a week (Sunday or Monday), and I’m alright with that. I wasn’t at one time, but I’ve gotten over that. It’s one of those things that you know you just can’t change, and it ceases to bother you, and while a part of me is saddened by this realization, another sighs in resignation. There’s very little fight left in me for that sort of thing.
Another thing that no longer bothers me: when my husband doesn’t immediately jump up to assist in housework. Oh, I steam a bit, but then I realize that, ‘Hey, if I wanted help all I had to do is ask, and well I didn’t ask, therefore he won’t know that I want help.’
(my toes are cold)
Another thing: Unless by some miracle, I will never be a housewife. It used to be something I would strive for, taking care of my house and making it look nice for my husband when he returned home. However, for that year that I was a ‘housewife’ I wasn’t a very good one. He ended up doing all the work while I lounged about like a blob on a log. I know now that unless we win the lottery, it isn’t going to happen. Even if he made enough money to comfortably support us financially, he wouldn’t like the thought of me not working, and him being the sole provider. Ergo, it’s to housekeeping I go. I’m starting to bring my work home with me as well. Once I get done cleaning there, I come home and do it. No matter how much my feel are hurting, or my back or hip, I need to just take an Ibuprofen. Why should I ask my hard-working husband to clean up, if I’m not willing to do it myself?
That’s about all I have to say this morning. Oh, by the way, it’s my anniversary.

Filed under: Musings

Another Quick Update While My HotPocket Cools…

graendil — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 18:27:06 +0000

Okay, I’m thinking of starting a secondary blog, so I’ll have one for reviews, and one for general shit. Maybe? I don’t know I haven’t decided.
Weight Loss Update:
For the last two weeks, I’ve been at a steady 216.2 lbs. We just got my brother’s Bowflex last night, so tonight we’ll begin working out daily. It’s awesome I’m so excited. So, this morning I stepped on the scale to see where I was, and it read: 213.8lbs, which is so killer.
That’s my update.

Filed under: Dreamings

Something Really Quick!

graendil — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 13:41:35 +0000

Before I go to work, I wanted to say…

I’VE LOST THREE POUNDS!!

I’m active at work (housekeeping), and figured since I do physical work, I would start taking some diet pills and eat right. I keep my calorie intake under 1600 (or at least do my very best), and take the stairs as much as possible. Since my weight loss started on August 1st, I have lost three (3) pounds, starting at 217 and am now down to 214. I’m coming for YOU, Juliettia!!

Filed under: Dreamings

GoVibe Red — Review

graendil — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 01:31:53 +0000

This is definitely not my favorite toy in my collection. In fact, it’s one I’ve put to the far back. It measures about 4”, or about the length of your palm, comes in clear, red, purple, and pink. Granted, it is petite and discreet, but has little to no actual power. It is made of simple plastic, making it easy to clean with toy cleaner and a cloth. The GoVibe uses one Aa battery, which is okay, but the moment you give it a fraction of a twist, it comes to life, and can sometimes be hard to turn off. There are no different speeds to this product, just one low level buzz that doesn’t do anything for those of us who need more power. As to the claim of being waterproof, I have not tried this in the shower, but I would probably consider it more splashproof than anything, as I feel submerging it in a tub would quickly render it useless. If I had to recommend this to someone, I say someone who doesn’t require a lot of vibrations in order to achieve an orgasm, as this won’t get any one else off.

Filed under: Reviews, Sex, Toying

Berman Anti-Bacterial Toy Cleaner 6.2 oz. — Review

graendil — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 01:00:47 +0000

There is only so much you can say about a toy cleaner. This particular product comes from the sex doctors Berman and Berman. It has the classic purple spray top I’ve come to associate with this line of products, and a clear decal clearly stating its intended purpose. The cleaner has no noticable smell, doesn’t leave your toys feeling sticky and in need of another wash, and it can be used in the privacy of your own bedroom, so you don’t have to make a run to the bathroom to clean your toys before playing with them. In the past I’ve had that issue, being excited and wanting to play only to realize that my play-things didn’t get washed after the last use. Problem solved! This product makes it easy to give the toy a few squirts, and voila! After wiping with a clean cloth, your toy is good as new, and squeaky clean. What’s not to love? Plus, it doesn’t leave the designated cloth or towel crunchily suspicious. However, for some toys you really should go ahead and use warm water and anti-bacterial soap, such as jel-Lee and others. This is a great product for anyone and everyone.

Filed under: Reviews, Toying

And…Wow

graendil — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 14:38:59 +0000

Yep, I’m still kicking. I haven’t been reviewing, shame on me, but I’m trying to get around to finishing up what I have, and possibly getting more. I now have a job, and spend my evenings with my husband, so you can see why I don’t want to spend a lot of time on the computer. But I will get there!
I miss talking to my friend, Juliettia. Granted even when we do talk it’s more like heyhihello and shit like that, but still. I miss it.
Lily is growing. Zombie cat is more skin than actual fat. I’m still fat. For some reason when the new WoW patch (3.3.2) came out last week, my computer wouldn’t update, saying some file couldn’t be renamed. Usually this is solved by reinstalling, yet for some reason now it won’t work at all. No repair, no reinstall, no WoW. At least I got to level 80, so small consolation there.
Our new Xbox 360 is great, I really love Soul Calibur 4, but atm I’m trying to beat Mortal Combat v. DC. We are going to get a new 40″ LCD tv next month, so that will be awesome to play Halo ODST co/op on.
Mother-in-Law will be here on July 7-July 13. Not too bad, just don’t know what we’re going to do to keep her entertained while we work. Oh well.
My own mother has her hysterectomy on July 13 to solve a severe cramp, a prolapsed uterus and dropped bladder. Ouch.
The Guild starts its new season on July 13th as well, so I highly recommend you go watch it, as it rocks socks. What will happen since Sid slept with the guild leader of a rival guild? We shall soon find out.
I’m going to get a new tattoo on my right forearm, the four horsemen of the apocalypse, but I can’t decide whether or not I want to do just the horseheads colored as they are supposed to be, or if I want to do them MLP style, which would be just awesome. SO hopefully I’ll get that…soon. Lol.
Other than that there’s no other updates. I have to go to work. TTYL

Filed under: Dreamings

The Fiesta DVD Review

graendil — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 00:21:20 +0000

The sex scenes were good, and there was no actual, tangible plot. What more can you ask for in an adult film? Plot, damn you. If you are going to pretend to have one, at least make it a good one! Admittedly the sex scenes themselves were hot, but there were a lot of random dancer shots that really had nothing to do with anything, and were sort of distracting. You’re just getting into it when BAM! Dancer. The narration of this movie was reminiscent of a thirties detective movie, with how the voice sounded. You never truly find out who Brianna Banks was, or why she invited them to her island. The orgy scene at the end was the best out of all of them, very arousing. It was easy to get in the mood with all that yumminess happening! This will definitely be a movie we watch again!

From BetterSex.com

Filed under: Evan Stone, Movies, Oral, Orgy, Reviews, Sex

Not So Naked!

graendil — Sun, 06 Jun 2010 18:22:15 +0000

So where exactly does friendliness end, and sluttiness begin? Oh, right about where you start sending a married man (seperated or not, still married) naked photos of yourself. So no, I am not sorry that someone you used to date uploaded naked photos of you onto the internet, whatever the circumstances. You deserved it, and I swear to Gods if I ever see you, hear from you, anything, I absolutely will punch you in your cunty, slutty throat. I have had enough of you ruining my life, and my marriage. I write this here, so that way I don’t email you all of this and exacerbate the situation. My husband knows that if you txt him, if he replies, any contact between the two of you is an automatic divorce, so be prepared to live with that. I’m sure that wouldn’t be a problem for a tramp like you, eh? You sure are something, you know? Sleeping with your ex, when he has a new girlfriend who is like your best friend. Wow. Loyalty. I won’t discuss the cause of my husband’s and your fights, or what they were about, but you deserved it. Pathetic is only the most proper term for you. You made your own bed for staying in that situation, so fucking lie in it, cold and alone.

Fuck You.

Filed under: Dreamings

Holy Marmalade Maude!

graendil — Sat, 29 May 2010 13:27:52 +0000

Ya know I’ve been reading through some old emotional posts, and realized I’ve really been focusing on the negative aspect of all this. Shouldn’t I be remembering all the good things? Well, I’ve feeling chipper (Maude has that effect on me ), and decided today that’s what this entry is going to be about. Let’s just hope things stay on the positive path, shall we, and not let some underlying feelings spring forth.

Although there is little actual love in this marriage *by love I mean passionate can’t live without you kind of stuff you know from all those Nicholas Sparks books*, we still manage to have a great time together. Whether or not it be playing Munchkin and royally getting my ASS handed to me *lmao*, or plopping down on the couch to watch anime or whatever else there is. We go to the library almost everyday, I’m being allowed to go to D&D with him *no breakdowns allowed please!*, and basic stuff like that. Although his phone still gets in the way some most of the time, I’m trying to make the best of it. I’m trying my damnnest not to be suspicious, and it’s not him I’m worried about, not really. It’s her I don’t trust, mainly because I don’t know her. The chances of us ever speaking on adult level are slim-to-none. I get infuriated at the mere thought of her, and I know that I’m not her favorite person in the world, but I can live with that. I guess I’ve seen too much of what they used to write/txt each other to be completely 100% okay with her being his friend. I do believe that, friends. It’s taken me a while, and a lot of reassurance, but I actually think that’s all he’s after. Oh man, now my mind is starting to race again >.<. I had such high hopes for this entry dammit!! Now I have to wonder at what I’m not seeing. Dammit dammit!! Well….shit.

Alright, she’s interesting, knows things, has similar interests, a beautiful smile, funny…what do I have? To be honest we really don’t have much in common, except…umm…there you go. I’m none of the things she is, yet he reassures me he *likes* me more than her. Wow, I really am that petty, aren’t I? I’ll admit it. Ooo! She’s talented, did I mention that? I didn’t? Well, it’s true. Me, I stare at a blank page for hours, then end up giving up and giving in. Words don’t come easily to me, they never have. (Ugh, I’m not feeling so well right now…) She’s so much better than I am in nearly every way, I can’t think of a reason why in the world he stays with me and not her.

But he does. He is by my side, and I need to cherish whatever remaining time together that we have. He leaves the room to txt her, and thanks to his Mom *swear to Gods had nothing to do with this — thanks Mary you’re a godsend!* he can’t txt her as much. But, there is always : Facebook, dA, eMails, Skype *oh gods how I hate you Skype*. Ha, I’ve put off laundry, because I know once I leave that’s what they’ll do. He leaves the house to call her *45 minutes wtf!*, because I might listen in. Duh, of course I’m going to, but it’s not like I’m going to grab the phone and tell her off. Believe it or not, I’ve got some dignity left. I’ll just glare. j/k. He’s so happy with her. Crickey, I’m jealous of a woman I’ve never met, how pathetic!! But it’s true. I know I’ve written about this enough. This was supposed to be happy-katz!! I refuse to get depressed!! (mumble/even though he’s leaving me for a few hours to be with his friends and probably txt her the whole freakin’ time/mumble). He’ll txt her no problem, but where am I? I’m home alone, waiting anxiously for 7a.m. to roll around. I check my phone nigh constantly, hoping I’ll hear from him. Alas, his words are not for me. They belong to her. I only wish I could capture his attention the way she does, albiet I know that’s impossible. I seem to be lacking in the “interesting” factor. What are my interests? Golden Girls, Maude, p0rn, reading, movies, hanging out. I’m about as deep as a peice of paper. There’s nothing underneath this grotesque exterior except some fucked up thoughts and paranoia. I don’t want to continue bringing her up, but for some reason I can’t let her go. I can’t let their friendship go. I guess I’m not secure enough in myself first? Yea, no idea there.

I hope there’s nothing more to say, at least not right now. My eyes feel heavy, though no tears will fall. Okay, one earlier today but that was because I stubbed my pinky toe >.<. I don’t want to cry, I’ve no reason to. These past few days have been awesome, with John’s and my coming to realize that even though we’re not in love *well, he’s not but who’s pointing fingers? her, and not feel so threatened. Then, I don’t fault him for getting butt-hurt at me, about Facebook and txts and stuff. That was pretty low, and I do feel horrible about it, but yes, my ego is so low I have to keep validating. My sister-in-law induces on Tuesday for her first baby, but I have no desire to see either or them, or any of them. That’s sort of unusual; I’ve become very close with my family over these last few years. But, for the life of me, I cannot bring myself to see them. I have no desire to. I like staying in my house, sometimes going out. There are mornings when I’ll wake depressed, because oh look, I woke up again. I have sleeping pills on the counter, and I will stare at them, some part of me saying “Take them, you’ll sleep for however long you want. You can even take them with Cognac!” Another part of me says “No, natural sleep is best, you know you’ll fall asleep. You might not wake if you take them.” *No worries, John. I won’t take them.* Yay he’s returned, kisses and all. >.> I love them kisses. Happy-Katz now!!! <3

The images came from Extremetube.com in their Categories section.

Filed under: Rantings